Posts Tagged ‘Nostalgic

10
Jan
22

Mac and Me (1988)

Viewing Date: 12/02/21

Starring: Paul Rudd 😉

Plot: An alien trying to escape from NASA is befriended by a wheelchair-bound boy.

Rules

  • Product Placement
  • Alien whistles (advanced rule)
  • Cartoonish alien distortion/action

Movie Quotes

  • “You sucked this living thing into a vacuum cleaner?”
  • “I bet he’s trying to tell us where he came from.” “A Wickes Furniture store?!”

Viewer Quotes

  • “This is a lot of whistling, by the way.”
  • Their mouths look like sphincters.”
  • “It doesn’t even look like workout gear. It looks like she’s running to her nursing job.”
  • “That’s the creepiest teddy bear I’ve ever seen.”
  • “What is happening in this McDonalds?!”

What We Learned

  • Aliens drink Coke
  • You can also revive an alien with Coke
  • MAC stands for Mysterious Alien Creature
  • ADUI- Alien Driving Under the Influence
  • In the 80’s, you had normal, horizontal house blinds in your car windows.
  • Aliens can be vacuumed up.
  • Aliens are fire proof

Final Take

29
Jul
21

Escape Plan 2: Hades (2018)

Date watched: 7/29/21

Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Dave Bautista, Xiaoming Huang (really the star of the movie), 50 cent (no vitamin water seen in the movie), kid from Desperate Housewives,  Amos from the Expanse

Plot: Years after he fought his way out of an inescapable prison, Ray Breslin has organized a new top-notch security force. But when one of his team members goes missing, Breslin must return to the hell he once escaped from. (From IMDB)

Rules:

  • Say “Algorithm”
  • Say “1764”
  • Product placement
  • Say “All prisoners return to your spoke”

Quotes:

  • “I need you to kick my ass.”
  • “Turns out the doctor is a lamp stand.”

Viewer Quotes:

  • “This movie feels a lot like Major League Soccer.  The league’s in China and we send them all of our aging stars out for one last paycheck.”
  • “Sly looks like he’s wearing a wax mask…  Or a Reagan mask.”

Things We Learned:

  • There’s an algorithm you can use to deal with terrorist extractions… but never trust it.
  • The best way to share confidential information is on sticky notes.
  • The best way to build an inescapable prison is to have one that rotates.  But it doesn’t matter, as Sly will find a way out.

Final Take:

This was pretty silly and painless.  It’s certainly not a classic, but it went down easy.  (Much like Coors Light on a boat on the lake in the summer while listening to Michael McDonald.) 

22
Aug
19

Rampage (2018)

Rampage

Date Watched: 8/22/19

Starring: The Rock, 80’s video game monsters, Negan as basically Negan

Plot: When three different animals become infected with a dangerous pathogen, a primatologist and a geneticist team up to stop them from destroying Chicago.  (from IMDB.com)

Rules: 

-Video game references
-Sign language w/ monkeys
-Say Crsper
-Dumb radio signal to lure the monsters

Quotes:

-“Is it me, or is he considerably bigger?”
-“I need that wolf… dead or alive”
-“What are you, some sort of International Man of Mystery?”
-“David, there’s something big in the river.”… “Well, that sucks.”

Viewer Quotes:

-“Has the Rock ever been in an actual good movie?”
-“Wow, this is really just a bunch of nonsense.”

Things We Learned:

-Monkeys can give people the finger and knock the Rock (pun intended).
-Ruthless CEO has Rampage video game in her office in a movie about Rampage video game.
-Doctors have access to helicopters.  (And damaged helicopters can “float” down buildings as they crumble.)
-Getting shot in the gut is no big deal if you’re The Rock.  (Just remember to occasionally wince.)
-Wolves can fly.

Final Take:

Not too shabby for a BMT Movie.  It certainly was silly, but it did a decent job of tone and being entertaining.  I’m not sure what else you could ask for in a movie about three cartoon monsters that scale a building.

29
Jun
18

Assassination Games (2011)

assassination games

Date Watched: 6/28/18

Starring: Jean-Claude Van Damme

Plot: Two assassins agree to work together as one tries to avenge his wife and the other collect a reward for a job.  (From IMDB)

Rules:
-Van Damme putting on/taking off sunglasses
-Flashbacks
-say “Polo”

Quotes:

“He was the best hitman on our payroll.”
“How did you do that? How did you get him to come out?” (In regards to the young woman stroking a turtle to make his head come out like an erection.)
“I sleep fine. I’m a weapon.”

Viewer Quotes:

“Oh yeah, she’s turned on by JCVD.”
“I’m no Eastern European hitman, but I know that I probably wouldn’t f$ck around with those guys or Jean-Claude Van Damme.”

Things We Learned:

-You can use a secret faucet handle in a crappy Romanian apartment to get to an a hidden giant apartment, even though it’s pretty obvious that the smaller apartment doesn’t have a bed and must really be bigger. (Even a young traumatized hooker can figure out a way into this “secret” room in minutes.)
-JCVD likes to utilize a crossbow with poisoned arrows for his hits.
-JCVD gets angry if you interrupt his violin playing when you’re being beaten by your deadbeat boyfriend with a switch.
-Mob bosses in Ukraine actually have hearts of gold.
-When someone says that they’re Santa Claus, you should cut their ear off with a box cutter.

Final Take:

3 stars. Better than average. Nothing special, but it wasn’t boring and it kept things moving. Plus, JCVD with a crossbow and a samurai sword is a nice touch.

 

06
Oct
17

Ghoulies 2 (1988)

Ghoulies 2

Date Watched: 10/5/2017

Starring: Some guys that died

Plot: The Ghoulies wreak havoc at an amusement park, disposing of those who mistake them for mere fairground attractions. (From IMDB)

Rules:

  • Stop motion
  • Someone says “Carnival”
  • Someone says “Tunes”

Quotes:

  • “I can do body work… baboom!”
  • “Have you seen my little muffy?”  (Response) “Who hasn’t?”
  • “He don’t go nowhere without his tunes.”
  • “This place is better than Epcot Center.”
  • “I’m a magician you sons of bitches!”

Viewer Quotes:

  • “Were girls actually uglier in the 80’s?”
  • “Can they re-brand the carnival to be the Devil’s Anus?”

Things We Learned:

  • Ghoulies can make cat sounds to lure in cat lovers and kill them with a switchblade.
  • 10 year olds have ninja throwing stars at their disposal to throw at wayward Ghoulies.
  • Having Ghoulies is a great way to make some extra mula from your crappy carnival ride.

Final Take:  Ghoulies delivers once again.  Like Ghoulies 3: Ghoulies Go to College,  this was great in terms of cheap entertainment and thrills.  Who doesn’t like a trashy carnival, especially circa 1988?

01
Jun
12

Dreamscape

 

Viewed on: April 2012

Starring: Christopher Plummer, Dennis Quaid, Max von Sydow, Spielberg’s wife

Summary:

A young psychic on the run from himself is recruited by the government to save the US president whose mind is trapped inside the dreamworld.

Rules:

  • Telekinesis / Mind powers
  • Saxophone
  • “Dream”
  • “Psychic”

Viewer quotes:

“As a kid, the video box made this movie seem a lot cooler than it is.”




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