Archive for November, 2017

17
Nov
17

R.I.P.D.

RIPD

Date Watched: 11/16/17

Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Jeff Bridges, Kevin Bacon, Mary Louise Parker

Plot: A recently slain cop joins a team of undead police officers working for the Rest in Peace Department and tries to find the man who murdered him.

Rules

  • Someone says “RIPD” or “Rest In Peace”.
  • See the alternate version of them.
  • Royseafus does something old cowboy.
  • Someone says “Dead-O”

Quotes

  • “You know what my funeral was?  Watching a bunch of coyotes pick my carcass clean and drag my bones off to a cave.  A freakin’ cave, hoss.”
  • “You ain’t my partner, rook.  You’re just the ass in the other seat.”
  • “RIPD don’t and don’t sleep.”  –  “So why do you eat this?”  –  “I enjoy the mouthfeel!”
  • “I thought you were some kind of rebel, Roy.” – “I fought for the North.”
  • “Total humiliation.  Just a pants-down spanking in the supermarket.”
  • “You agreeing with me… that’s weird.” – “Yeah, feels strange…kind of tingly.”
  • “She billy-goated me!”

Viewer Quotes

  • “What’s this thing called?  Ripped?”
  • “As a big-budget Hollywood blockbuster, this is a disaster.  But as a smaller, no expectation, weird flick, it’s not bad.”
  • “So time freezes anytime anyone dies?  Nobody would get anything done!”

Things We Learned

  • Indian food transforms dead people into monsters, specifically cumin.
  • RIPD don’t eat or sleep, just kick Dead-O’s ass.
  • Dead people still live among us (some of us knew that all along)
  • Jeff Bridges likes a nice turn of an ankle.
  • How to billy-goat somebody.

Final Take: Not as bad as some will have you believe.  If your expectations are as low as ours were, you will likely find this movie just fine, and Jeff Bridges character in particular was pretty entertaining.

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03
Nov
17

Security (2017)

Security

Date Watched: 11/2/2017

Starring: Antonio Banderas and Ben Kingsley

Plot: A security guard protects an eleven year-old girl who is being targeted by a gang for participating as a trial witness. (From IMDB)

Rules:

  • See an American Flag
  • See generic mall imagery like cheesy family pictures on the wall

Quotes:

  • “You like cleaning toilets?”  (Response)  “I’d do anything.”
  • “That’s why we call him Mason Bacon.”
  • “Right now time is our enemy.  Lets make time our friend.”

Viewer Quotes:

  • “Did Antonio Banderas actually make any movies that made money… not counting Shrek or the first Zorro?”  (Response)  “Of course he did.  He was an A List star at one point… (looking at IMDB) oh wait, never mind.”
  • “Is this the Ecks vs. Sever sequel?”
  • “The pitch for this movie: Lets do Die Hard in a mall with a little slice of Home Alone.”

Things We Learned:

  • Snipers hired by Ben Kingsley are terrible.
  • When Antonio Banderas promises you that if you stay with him you’ll be fine, you won’t be, you’ll be dead.

Final Take:  Entertaining and highly watchable.  Everyone takes this movie very seriously, as they should.  The production values and the cast elevate this silly material way above where it should be.