Date Watched: 5/12/16
Plot: When a strange virus quickly spreads through a safari park and turns all the zoo animals undead, those left in the park must stop the creatures before they escape and zombify the whole city. (From IMDB)
Starring: Terrible green screen animals
Rules:
Animal Zombies
Giraffes – Zombie Giraffes = drink two
Say “Eden”
Jump Scares
Drone shots of the park
Quotes:
“Let’s just say that I got drunk at the wrong bar with the wrong policeman.”
“You don’t look like the kind of girl that likes to get dirty.”
“I swear that gorilla was trying to mate with me.”
“Excuse me intern, this is my sanctuary, and I decide what’s good!”
Viewer Quotes:
“They have a tracker on every dinosaur in the park… I mean err, animal.”
“I wish that little girl would turn into a zombie.”
“Is he going to kill Clay Mathews?”
Things We Learned:
-Irritating little girls are worse than terrible monkey special effects or guys in phony gorilla suits.
-Zombie giraffes like to attack in pairs and draw and quarter their victims.
-Zombieism makes animals smarter, faster, and stronger.
-Guts make good eagle’s nests.
Final Take:
It was an OK rip-off of Jurassic World. The zombie giraffes were great, but very limited in their screen time. If they ever do a sequel, I hope that they make them the true stars that they are.