Viewing Date: Jan 30, 2014
Starring: Robert the tire
Plot
When Robert, a tire, discovers his destructive telepathic powers, he soon sets his sights on a desert town; in particular, a mysterious woman becomes his obsession.
Rules
- Exploding heads or animals
- Breaking the “4th wall”
- Insect / telekinesis sounds
- Psychokinetic powers
- Peanut gallery commentary
- Weird music that just doesn’t belong
- “No reason.”
Quotes
“My God the kid was right. The killer is the tire!”
“What position? “Probably start with a nice blow job.”
“Get that dirty tire out of the pool or I’m going to get really mad!”
“Is the tire black?”
“You’re nothing but a rubber shit.”
“It’s not the end!! He’s been reincarnated as a tricycle!”
Viewer Quotes
“How much time is left in this?”
“At least it was short.”
What We Learned
- Tires have telekinesis
- Tires can be reincarnated as tricycles
- Women should close the door when they take showers in shitty motels.
- There is no reason for anything
- All important films contain an element of ‘no reason’
- Some bad movies go by faster than you’d expect.
Final Take
This one had been on our list for a long time. It seems like a wonderfully bad concept, but the filmmakers really have to beat you over the head with the fact that the film is all for no reason. Really, we would be fine with “no reason”, but we are not fine with “no fun to watch”. Unfortunately, this movie was both.
Bad Movie Thursday 
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