30
Nov
12

The FP

Date Watched: 11/29/2012

Starring: JTRO, BTRO, and KCDC

Plot 

In a post apocalyptic future, two rival gangs fight for control of Frazier Park by playing “Beat Beat Revelation”, a deadly version of Dance, Dance, Revolution(TM).

Rules

  • Stupid Hats/Bandannas (One per occurrence per new scene)
  • “J TRO” or “B TRO”
  • “The FP”
  • Reference to area codes
  • Ducks
  • Advanced rule – waterfall through all montages

Quotes

  • “4 score and a couple years ago.”
  • “I’m going to 187 this bitch, bro!”
  • “You fuckin’ cracker ass cracka!” <one white guy to another>
  • “I hope you’re ready for this, Cranberry Juice, because you’re about to get fucked, bitch!”
  • “What’s a town with no ducks, J Tro?  How’s a nigga supposed to sort his shit out with no ducks?!”
  • “We had each other’s backs, back to back!”
  • “You got to dance with your mind, not your legs.”
  • “I’m going to throw you down some stairs, you toe-eyed dung dung.”
  • “A gentleman never fucks a bitch in the ass and tells.”  “It was only for a minute.”
  • “You got one final lesson up in this mother fucker, J Tro.  You gots to know the true meaning of the Beat Beat nigga.  It ain’t about color, dog.  Any nigga can be a nigga.  N – I – G – G – A.  Never Ignorant in Getting Goals Accomplished. Now you use that shit, J Tro.  You be all the nigga you can be.”  <Climactic monologue>
  • “Shit, man!  Click it or ticket.”
  • “How you doing all this shit?”  “Because, I’m never ignorant in getting goals accomplished.”

Viewer Quotes

  • “Is this stuff for real?  Are they being serious?”
  • “That guy’s wearing a racoon hat!”
  • “That other guy’s wearing a skeleton mask!”
  • “Did he just roar like a lion?”
  • “He died doing what he loves…”
  • “He’s watching a film upside-down.”
  • “Just hanging out in a kiddie pool.”
  • “Asian gets a slingshot!”
  • “I think this whole movie may have been about drunks feeding ducks in the end.”

What We Learned

  • The post apocalyptic future looks a lot like normal rural America.
  • Drunks feeding ducks are a stabilizing factor in modern society.
  • A good day ends with a BJ while watching ducks.
  • Dance Dance Revolution can be deadly.
  • The true meaning of nigga.
  • Eye patches do not negatively affect depth perception.
  • Giant moon boots increase your capability to dance.

Final Take

This was a pretty damn good thursday movie.  It was post-apocalyptic, had decent production values, and ended with a BJ.  The house rule for 4-letter swears would be an advanced rule all by itself.  The word “fuck” was used over 250 times.  This is up there as one of the better Thursday movies we’ve watched in a while.  Watch it and don’t expect it to be serious and you’ll end up having a great time.

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