Bad Movie Thursday

Viewing Date: Nov 19, 2020

Starring: Rick Hill, Barbi Benton, Richard Brooker, Lana Clarkson, Victor Bo

Plot

The warrior Deathstalker is tasked by an old witch to obtain and unite the three powers of creation – a chalice, an amulet, and a sword – lest the evil magician Munkar get them and use them for nefarious purposes. After obtaining the sword, Deathstalker joins with other travelers going to the Big Tournament to determine the strongest warrior. The false king holds the true princess in captivity, and plots to have Deathstalker killed, and Deathstalker must fight to free the princess. (via IMDB)

Rules

• “Monkar”
• “Deathstalker”
• Deathstalker’s sword lights up
• Little people
• Random T&A
• Beheadings
• (advanced) Anything misogynistic

Quotes

• “Join three things separate to be the power.”
• “I steal and kill to stay alive, not for the luxury of glory.”

Viewer Quotes

• “Is that Chepko, jumping right into the mud?”
• “The bad scene was actually just the cast afterparty with too much booze & coke.”
• “He’s going to violate this guy when he’s a woman!”

What We Learned

• Just saying what you want to happen works as magic words
• Heroes and Fools are the same thing
• Deathstalker’s primary motivation is rape
• (men fighting) is a sound for the closed caption / hearing impaired audience

Final Take

This was a throwback to the days of cheesy 80’s barbarian films where a band of misfits has to go on a quest to overthrow the requisite evil sorcerer, complete with terrible effects and fight sequences. Also a throwback to the days when they could get away with an over-the-top sexism. Examples include the barbarian party featuring naked mud wrestling and thee heroic female warrior only wearing a loosely fitting robe (basically topless the entire movie). I suppose his name is ‘Deathstalker’ but he isn’t a very “heroic” hero…. But it was the perfect recipe for Bad Movie Thursday– just so much absurdity. Did I mention the evil “Munkar” (I should have named my dog that), has a worm puppet monster as a pet and feeds it eyeballs? How about the evil henchman who was transformed into a woman in order to assassinate Deathstalker only to be (nearly) violated by him? This was a fun movie that kept us laughing and has us looking forward to the sequels.