19
Jun
15

Turbulence 3: Heavy Metal (2001)

Turbulence 3

Viewing Date: 6/18/15

Plot: Terrorists hijack an airplane that is broadcasting a rock concert live on the Internet. (From IMDB)

Starring: Rutger Hauer, Joe Mantegna, the chick from Burn Notice, and lots of C List actors

Rules:

  • Marilyn Manson knockoff music
  • Stupid hacking scenes
  • Every time they say “Craven”
  • If Rutger Hauer steps outside the cockpit
  • Outside shots of the plane in flight

Quotes:

“Thank you for the panties.  I love you.”

“I like the sound of his music.  It reminds me of Nam.”

“You need to log onto the Z WebTV website.  There’s a concert on a plane.”

Viewer Quotes:

“Did we drink to that guy’s mustache?  Because it’s disgusting.”

“I hope Rutger Hauer gets to kill someone.”

Question:  “They’re using the same guy?!  How dumb do they think we are?”  Response:  “Well, we are watching Turbulence 3.”

Things We Learned:

  • Airplanes in flight are the ideal spot to hold a death metal concert. Although strangely, sometimes things go awry.
  • Eastern Kansas is one of the most unholiest places in the world.
  • Planes will go into a tailspin if you let go of the controls for even a second.
  • An experienced pilot taking over control of a plane from a drugged out rocker and a hacker can cause a plane crash if the two of them already “have a bond”.
  • When a bandmate dies, it’s no big deal.

Final Take:

This was entertaining and compared to most of the normal Thursday night schlock, this was definitely more watchable than most.  I hate to say it, but this movie makes me want to watch the rest of the Turbulence trilogy, so mission accomplished.  I’m still not sure that Joe Mantegna didn’t need to do this movie to make a boat payment, or that Rutger Hauer didn’t film his scenes in his basement, but this is a fun movie that I’d recommend to watch.

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