Bad Movie Thursday

Viewing Date: Mar 2, 2023

Starring: Paul Hogan, Linda Kozlowski, Jere Burns, cameo by Mike Tyson

Plot

From the opening shot of a Jurassic Park-esque reptilian eye, you know you are in for a wild ride. As Mick “Crocodile” Dundee sits in a canoe sharpening his famous knife, a monstrous croc hides somewhere in the deep. The croc suddenly attacks, tearing Mick’s boat to pieces and leaving him and mate Jacko up a tree. Life for Mick can only get easier, right? When Mick arrives at home, he discovers longtime companion Sue’s newspaper-mogul father has called, and needs her help on an article at the paper’s Los Angeles branch. Mick, who recognizes his importance in the modernizing bush is now no more than as a tourist attraction, agrees to join her, and together Mick, Sue and son Mikey head for Los Angeles. Here the adventure truly begins, as Mick and Jacko brave a cowboy bar where the horsemen are of a different color, and a Hollywood film party where everyone seems interested in Mick’s mate Malcolm “Mal” Gibson’s colorful exploits. Sue’s article soon leads to a sleazy film producer, so Mick gets a job as a monkey wrangler at his studio, where his investigation uncovers some very sketchy goings-on (via IMDB).

Rules

• Australians not understanding modern culture
• Fish out of water gags
• Crocodile Dundee drives a Subaru Outback
• References to previous CD movies
• Women inexplicably attracted to Mick or his sidekick
• Product placements

Quotes

• “This is one of those soft tops…” “CAVE IN!”
• “Man stuff, right?”
• “…Built like a brick dunny.”
• “Isn’t that the guy that had the skunk on the freeway?”

What we learned:

• A skunk is “man stuff”
• If you are Australian, you have animal whispering powers
• Australians are somehow aware of, yet entirely shocked and impressed with, fast food drive thrus
• The best way to smuggle priceless works of art is through an elaborate movie production, which films in two locations
• If you are summoned to take a Newspaper job as a short term assignment, you get to live in a Beverly Hills mansion and must enroll your kid in school
• Its easy to get a walk-on job as an extra in Hollywood, with opportunity for promotion to pet handler.

Final Take

Where do we start? Sad that the Crocodile Dundee franchise ended in such a pathetic money grab (I sure could go for some Wendy’s and a diet Pepsi!), when we all have such fond, nostalgic memories of the first two. This version seems to be targeted to children, with the accompanying plot and jokes you would expect. In the first one, it was largely believable that Mick wouldn’t understand a bidet, cocaine or some of the stranger aspects of city life, but he seems to not have learned anything through his life experiences. But somehow this still makes him as attractive and charming as ever to the ladies. Watch for the bizarre cameo by Mike Tyson, who teaches Mick and his son to meditate (for some reason) while hanging out in a park.