Posts Tagged ‘horror

05
Dec
25

Shark Side of the Moon

By badmoviethursday Leave a Comment
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , ,

Viewing Date: 12/4/2025

Starring: Maxi Witrak, Ego Mikitas

Plot: Decades ago, the USSR developed unkillable sharks and launched them to the moon. Today, a team of American astronauts will endure the fight of their lives.

Rules

  • Stupid space science jargon (Advanced rule, this is literally every other line of the movie)
  • “Yutu-2” or “Quequio Sattellite”
  • References to the Dark Side of the Moon album

Quotes

  • “Nothing under the moon should cause ripples like that.”
  • “Why are there sharks on the moon?”
  • “Americans…welcome to the moon!”
  • “I knew there was something ‘fishy’ about her.”
  • “Follow me, and don’t get any blood on you.”

Viewer Quotes

  • “They are half human.” – “The bottom half.”
  • “The first thing you should do when you’re about to crash into the moon is strap your seatbelt.”
  • “It’s interesting that rebooting the ship didn’t affect their artificial gravity.”
  • “Who’s going to open a window? I don’t think they make windows that roll down in a space ship.”
  • “So he’s got a half-shark daughter?” – “Technically she’s a quarter shark.”
  • “She hears pretty well in the vacuum of space.”
  • “What do space sharks eat? There’s nothing to hunt on the moon.”
  • “Is that actually his daughter? Did he make love to a shark lady?”
  • “With all their hybrid shark technology, they can’t make a rocket?” – “They can’t even make proper clothes.”
  • “That’s the song I want playing when I die. Yakkity Saks.”
  • “That’s what I felt like after Thanksgiving.”

What We Learned

  • In the future, astronauts don’t have headphones. Two of them split a pair of air pods.
  • When you’re in trouble, restart the ship.
  • Hybrid space sharks can track electromagnetic waves.
  • Chain mail can replace a space suit on the moon.
  • Space sharks have nipples
  • Hybrid sharks reproduce in jars with umbilical chords.

Final Take

The whole movie was just utter nonsense, but I didn’t hate it. That’s the best way to summarize this movie experience. You’d think a movie about space sharks would be a pretty simple plot to follow, but you’d be wrong. There’s no explanation for most of what you see and you’ll be left with a lot more questions than answers. On the whole, though, I’d say it was worth the watch. I look forward to reading this post again in the future and reliving these memories.

20
Mar
25

Maniac Cop (1988)

By badmoviethursday Leave a Comment
Categories: Cult Classic
Tags: ,

Maniac Cop (Special Edition)

Viewing Date: Mar 20, 2025

Starring: Tom Atkins, Bruce Campbell, Laurene Landon, Richard Roundtree

Plot: Innocent people are being brutally murdered on the streets of New York City by a uniformed police officer. As the death toll rises and City Hall attempts a cover-up, Frank McCrae heads the investigation. A young cop, Jack Forrest, finds himself under arrest as the chief suspect, having been the victim of a set-up by the real killer and a mysterious woman phone-caller. Forrest, his girlfriend Theresa, and McCrae set out to solve the puzzle before the Maniac Cop can strike again. (via IMDB)

Rules

  • Trash on the street
  • “Maniac”, “Psycho”, “Crazy”
  • “Cordell”
  • Cop stereotypes, tropes or dialogue

Quotes

  • “Cops like killing. That’s why they’re cops.”
  • You should have seen him on the operating table… Cut to pieces.”

What We Learned

  • NYPD patrol officers all wore white gloves for some reason
  • Maniac cop has / had a girlfriend
  • Maniac cop likes a good St. Patty’s day parade

Final Take

Our decision around watching Maniac Cop wasn’t that we thought it would be a great BMT film, but would be a gateway for the sequels, which we expect to be more absurd and entertaining. We were basically right on that- I wouldn’t say Maniac Cop was good, but it took itself a little too seriously (especially for a Troma movie). So much more potential there, but ended up as a slow paced, procedural meets Halloween meets Terminator. Was Cordell, the Maniac Cop alive, dead, or just bullet proof and ice cold? We’re not sure, but after escaping / being released from Sing Sing), he was super strong and liked to kill innocent people as revenge for… being framed by corrupt politicians.

The short entry was not by design- there just really wasn’t much material to work with. On the positive side, there were some good car chases and stunts, especially considering the low budget, and of course, Bruce Campbell.

Here’s to the sequels being more entertaining.

22
Nov
24

Birdemic 3: Sea Eagle

By badmoviethursday Leave a Comment
Categories: Uncategorized
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Viewing Date: 11/21/24

Starring: Ryan Lord, Julia Culbert, Marc DeNola

Plot

A flock of sea eagles attack the coastal town of Santa Cruz, California. Why did the birds attack? Who will survive? (via IMDB)

Rules

  • Bird Attack
  • “Sea Eagle” (movie title)
  • Scenes that go on too long.
  • Environmental Preachiness
  • The guy and girl walking together

Quotes

  • “I’m looking for a three-bedroom house surrounded by trees. Preferably in a forest.”
  • “Well, I think we need to fix Global Warming.”
  • “Let’s take their guns and defend ourselves from those crazy birds.”
  • “Yes, we have to accept our fate. It is death.”

Viewer Quotes

  • “This is so much padding for an 83 minute movie.”
  • “Are you sure this movie is about bird attacks and not just climate change?”
  • “Why is this guy talking about Rejuvenate and the 9 mechanisms of aging again?”
  • “My God, where are the birds?”
  • “Stay in your lane, Birdemic.”
  • “Hey mister – can you please sing to us as we dance in this empty room?”
  • “Just when you think a scene can’t go any longer, it does. And just when it can’t get any more awkward, it gets so awkward you can barely stand it.”
  • “We’re three quarters of the way into this movie, no crazy birds yet.”
  • “This is another awesome diatribe on climate change.”

What We Learned

  • The normal weather patterns are changing rapidly. (Learned from a nature documentary that is played in the movie for no reason)
  • Don’t leave your car running and go dancing off into the woods.
  • Eagles are really good at cutting people’s throats as they fly by. They never miss.

Final Take

This movie did not have any crazy bird sightings until literally 60 minutes into an 83 minute movie. That is all you need to know. The entire first hour was filled with nothing but inane diatribes on climate change. It was just one scene after another of weird, contrived scenes where the leads encounter new people that just immediately start ranting about climate change. On top of that, there would be probably the most uncomfortable scenes ever put on camera, and they would stretch on so long it was like a psychological study in human capacity to withstand awkwardness. If that sounds like your bag, you can think about watching it. I wouldn’t, though. Not ever again.

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